An Irish Thanksgiving

For as long as Jess can remember, her mother, Lindy, always made corned-beef dinner for St. Patrick's day. This is one of Jess's favorite meals and you can imagine why: just the name, "CORNed BEEF," screams Iowa, doesn't it?! Brian, on the other hand, never really experienced St. Patty's Day corned-beef dinners growing up . . . which is funny because he's the Catholic and the only one with a bit of Irish heritage! In any case, Jess wanted to make this St. Patrick's Day special for her new family: Brian and Oliver.

We begin by boiling the beef for 4 hours in a mixture of salt, pepper, thyme, paprika, allspice, and bay leaves. Mmmm, if only they made corned-beef scented candles, the apartment could smell like this all the time!


Instead of fixing the typical boiled vegetables, we decided to roast the new potatoes, carrots, and onions. (Yes, Mom, my oven needs a good cleanin'.)


We then quick braised the cabbage with butter, thyme, parsley, and a cup of the broth from the boiling beef.


At 7:30 p.m. we finally sat down to enjoy our new favorite holiday: Thanksgiving in March! Sadly, you'll notice there's no Irish beer :(


And 10 minutes later . . . we have leftovers for a month!


Turns out Yorkshire Terriers are Scottish, but Ollie sure nailed the I'm-a-cute-little-Irish-beggar-so-please-feed-me-some-corned-beef look:

HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY from our table to yours!

Who's running this show anyway?

Brian is a sucker. He will do anything Oliver tells him!

"Hey Dad, get on all fours and pretend you're the doggy!"


"Hey Dad, now pretend like you're in pain because I'm ferociously attacking you!"


"Now stay still, Dad, I'm going to use your head as a launching pad!"


"I love you, Dad. Hold me like I'm a baby and pretend my bully stick is a bottle."

Oliver's Diet

The vet says he's teething, but our parental instincts tell us he's lacking nutrition. Let us be perfectly clear, Oliver has the most loving parents. We dote over him constantly! He has a million toys—well maybe just a dozen or two, but he certainly doesn't starve for toys or attention! We feed him top-shelf imported dog food, the kind you can only find at ONE store in New York City, way up on the upper west side. His food is so good, humans can eat it . . . and Jess has! Furthermore, we don't buy just any old rawhide sticks for him to chew on, oh no, we buy him "Bully Sticks" (made from real bull tendon) at $5 a pop.

In short, Oliver is spoiled. So why, oh why is he eating our APARTMENT?! Seriously! He's actually eating us out of house and home! Brian thinks that Oliver has some master plan to "renovate" the apartment and this so-called "teething" period is all part of his demolition work. (Ugh, he's clearly not the disciplinarian.) Jess, on the other hand, thinks her cute little Yorkie is turning into a cockroach, and she has the evidence to prove it . . .

Exhibit A. The corner of the bookshelf.


Exhibit B. The dining room chairs.


Exhibit C. The baseboards of the hallway.


Exhibit D. The grout (yes, grout!) from the kitchen floor.


Exhibit E. The lining underneath the couch.

Exhibit F. The magazine basket.

Exhibit G. My latest issue of New York Magazine.


The Suspect. I know he looks cute, but if you let him get too close, he may eat YOU next!

Snowed In!

Classes are canceled today at Hofstra: an estimated 10–15'' of snow will be blowing over Long Island this afternoon. Poor Brian had to go to school today . . . but let's not feel too sorry for him . . . his commute to Brooklyn College takes him 10 minutes!

The day belongs to Melon! The house is clean, the coffee pot is bubbling, and the view from the fifth floor of her Brooklyn apartment reminds her—if only a little bit—of a typical winter day in Iowa. What will she do today?

1. "Sleep in" until 7 a.m.
2. Call her Mom at 7:30 a.m. to rub it in . . . how cruel . . .
3. Maybe eat a hot breakfast instead of the saltine crackers she usually eats on the train!
4. Dress up her puppy in his adorable green sweater and introduce him to SNOW!
5. Go grocery shopping at Target!
6. Make a HUGE pot of chili and a pan of cornbread for what is likely the last snowfall of the season . . .